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Q. On a regular occasion, my wife and I like to get oout and do things. On a regular occasion, my children feel the urge to lash out and do something that really frustrates us, and they know is not allowed. How do we keep our cool, and discipline them in a public place where there might be people watching?
Kids are 2 (girl), and 5 (boy). Sometimes we think staying at home is the only answer.
Kids are 2 (girl), and 5 (boy). Sometimes we think staying at home is the only answer.
Answer
discipline starts at home & the good behavior carries over into the public.
You need to be more firm at home so the kids know they will not get away with it home and won't get away with it outside the home.
How to discipline in public? Depends on how old your child is.
When our kids were toddlers we'd take them to the car for a time out. If we saw the start of a tantrum, our child wouldn't sit down & be still or they were screaming we'd take them out to the car. We'd buckle them in their carseat then sit in the car for 2mins. After that we'd look at our child and ask "Are you done? Can we got back now?" If the child nodded or responded with a screaming nod then we got out of the car, went to unbuckle them giving the warning "If you do this again or do not stop screaming we are going to have another times out." This almost always worked.
If they are older say 5+ then they can still do a car time out. But I think by age 5 a time out in public will work. It can be pretty shameful too. Once our child was not playing very safely at the park which was a danger to her & other kids. I don't remember what she was doing but I remember I was worried she or someone would get hurt. She did not listen to our warnings to stop or do something different. So we called her over to us, we sat her down on a picnic table bench a little ways away from us and made her wait it out. Her friend came over to ask us why she was sitting there and we calmly explained she was having a time out and could play again soon. I think just that in itself helped change the behavior. Plus any other times we mentioned a time out in public she behaved.
I had had friends give spankings to their kids in public. But honestly I never felt that was the right thing. First I feel a spanking is between the parent & a the child. Not the whole world. Plus some people feel it is child abuse and have been known to report it. A firm talk and warning about a spanking at home is good enough.
One friend years ago had to tell his daughter she would get a spanking when she got home. They were out to eat and she wasn't playing nicely. She didn't listen and he said she'd get a spanking when they got home. This was done quietly in a whisper. Later while she was playing she yelled loud enough for the whole place here "Daddy, do I still get a spanking or can I ask for mercy?" lol She meant forgiveness. The father replied "No" & The father said he turned so red in the face. But moment later an older woman walked by him, patted him on the shoulder and said she was glad to see at least one parent making the kids behave.
The next step after getting the kids to behave at home is let them know what is expected of them outside the home. Church is place to sit down and be quiet. A playground is a place to have fun, yell & run around but also they should be expected to treat others nicely and listen to you without a fight.
Next time you are out and the act up they need to be removed from that situation ASAP. Even if you are shopping sto and correct your child. We use to take our kids into the restroom at the grocery story. I'd firmly tell them that they were not behaving and when we got home they were in trouble. I told them I expected them to behave for now on & if the kept it up they would be in more trouble.
You have to follow through too. My mom & dad gave me empty threats. I knew they didn't mean it & I knew screaming would only get my own way.
It is nice to see someone wanting to correct their kids in public. My biggest pet peeve is parents who sit back and watch their kids destroy something, run around bothering others and the parents just sit back ignoring it.
discipline starts at home & the good behavior carries over into the public.
You need to be more firm at home so the kids know they will not get away with it home and won't get away with it outside the home.
How to discipline in public? Depends on how old your child is.
When our kids were toddlers we'd take them to the car for a time out. If we saw the start of a tantrum, our child wouldn't sit down & be still or they were screaming we'd take them out to the car. We'd buckle them in their carseat then sit in the car for 2mins. After that we'd look at our child and ask "Are you done? Can we got back now?" If the child nodded or responded with a screaming nod then we got out of the car, went to unbuckle them giving the warning "If you do this again or do not stop screaming we are going to have another times out." This almost always worked.
If they are older say 5+ then they can still do a car time out. But I think by age 5 a time out in public will work. It can be pretty shameful too. Once our child was not playing very safely at the park which was a danger to her & other kids. I don't remember what she was doing but I remember I was worried she or someone would get hurt. She did not listen to our warnings to stop or do something different. So we called her over to us, we sat her down on a picnic table bench a little ways away from us and made her wait it out. Her friend came over to ask us why she was sitting there and we calmly explained she was having a time out and could play again soon. I think just that in itself helped change the behavior. Plus any other times we mentioned a time out in public she behaved.
I had had friends give spankings to their kids in public. But honestly I never felt that was the right thing. First I feel a spanking is between the parent & a the child. Not the whole world. Plus some people feel it is child abuse and have been known to report it. A firm talk and warning about a spanking at home is good enough.
One friend years ago had to tell his daughter she would get a spanking when she got home. They were out to eat and she wasn't playing nicely. She didn't listen and he said she'd get a spanking when they got home. This was done quietly in a whisper. Later while she was playing she yelled loud enough for the whole place here "Daddy, do I still get a spanking or can I ask for mercy?" lol She meant forgiveness. The father replied "No" & The father said he turned so red in the face. But moment later an older woman walked by him, patted him on the shoulder and said she was glad to see at least one parent making the kids behave.
The next step after getting the kids to behave at home is let them know what is expected of them outside the home. Church is place to sit down and be quiet. A playground is a place to have fun, yell & run around but also they should be expected to treat others nicely and listen to you without a fight.
Next time you are out and the act up they need to be removed from that situation ASAP. Even if you are shopping sto and correct your child. We use to take our kids into the restroom at the grocery story. I'd firmly tell them that they were not behaving and when we got home they were in trouble. I told them I expected them to behave for now on & if the kept it up they would be in more trouble.
You have to follow through too. My mom & dad gave me empty threats. I knew they didn't mean it & I knew screaming would only get my own way.
It is nice to see someone wanting to correct their kids in public. My biggest pet peeve is parents who sit back and watch their kids destroy something, run around bothering others and the parents just sit back ignoring it.
I need step by step directions on how to make a bench cushion for my kitchen table.?
Q. I bought an Ikea kitchen bench and I would like to make a cushion for it. I have a vague idea how to do it - and the supplies I'll need, but I think I should have some step by step instructions just in case.
Is it as simple as plywood, spray adhesive, foam, and fabric??
Is it as simple as plywood, spray adhesive, foam, and fabric??
Answer
You seem to be on the right track. You did not say if the top if the bench is finished. I am assuming that it is not.
You can adhere the foam to the plywood, but it is not necessary as the fabric will hold the foam into place.
1. Place fabric face down on a clean surface.
2. Place a layer of polyester batting down on the fabric.
3. Place foam cushion top of the batting.
4. Place the plywood over the foam.
5. Smooth the batting over the foam and plywood. Staple one side of the batting, Mitre the corners of the foam so that it is not bulky. (You may need to trim some of the batting. Staple the opposite side, then finish the remaining sides.
6. I like to sew the corners of the fabric for a finished edge, but you can carefully fold the corners of the fabric, (like a gift) and staple the fabric in the same manner as the batting.
You can then screw the bench to the bottom of the plywood.
YOU ARE DONE!
If the cushion in loose, the easiest way to do this is to sew the fabric on three sides and 1/3 of the way on each end of the remaining side. (Making a pillow case type cover.) Then turn the cover inside out. Take each corner and form a triangle from the flattened sides of the corners. Sew a seam on each corner the depth of the cushion. This gives a nice finished look. Turn inside - out. Then stuff cover with pillow and then hand sew the remaining portion of the seam.
You seem to be on the right track. You did not say if the top if the bench is finished. I am assuming that it is not.
You can adhere the foam to the plywood, but it is not necessary as the fabric will hold the foam into place.
1. Place fabric face down on a clean surface.
2. Place a layer of polyester batting down on the fabric.
3. Place foam cushion top of the batting.
4. Place the plywood over the foam.
5. Smooth the batting over the foam and plywood. Staple one side of the batting, Mitre the corners of the foam so that it is not bulky. (You may need to trim some of the batting. Staple the opposite side, then finish the remaining sides.
6. I like to sew the corners of the fabric for a finished edge, but you can carefully fold the corners of the fabric, (like a gift) and staple the fabric in the same manner as the batting.
You can then screw the bench to the bottom of the plywood.
YOU ARE DONE!
If the cushion in loose, the easiest way to do this is to sew the fabric on three sides and 1/3 of the way on each end of the remaining side. (Making a pillow case type cover.) Then turn the cover inside out. Take each corner and form a triangle from the flattened sides of the corners. Sew a seam on each corner the depth of the cushion. This gives a nice finished look. Turn inside - out. Then stuff cover with pillow and then hand sew the remaining portion of the seam.
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Title Post: How do I discipline my children in public?
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Rating: 96% based on 9658 ratings. 4,4 user reviews.
Author: Unknown
Thanks For Coming To My Blog
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