My kids need 24/7 assistance!?

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Proud Momm

I am a mom of a five year old daughter and 3 year old quad's and they can be a hassle. I have now realized I can't even go to the bathroom without hearing a bang, boom, or crash! For example today while all my 5 kids were calmly watching TV I figured i could go outside and make a quick phone call. I came back to find they had gotten inside the fridge and was playing with the flour, throwing it at eachother, playing with it, and throwing it in the air and pretended it was snowing. I was gone for 5 minutes tops. Also I needed to go to the bathroom, about 50 seconds. I came back and my daughter had jumped off the kitchen table and cut her arm on a chair, needing 7 stitches. This stuff happens every day, and being a single mom I don't make enough money for a nanny and most teens I hire for babysitters can not handle my kids, and quit. They go to preschool during the year but now that its summer they go to a 3 hour camp fallowing a 2 hour nap, so once it's 1 o'clock its mommy dudy untill 8 o'clock the next morning. What should i do? I need to work to make money but they are so wild I cannot do that.
It isnt that east to be a single, working mother for 5 young children, very close in age. I try to punish them but it doesn't seem to work.
My husband died last year from cancer, and we have very few relatives. And i only planned to have 2 kids, wasnt expecting quad's. (but wouldnt trade them for the world!)

Answer
If the father(s) are paying child support, you should have enough to hire a professional adult babysitter. Where are their fathers anyway? And if the father's of the children are not paying child support, then you have to get a lawyer and drag them into court for a declaration of paternity and court-ordered child support (make sure the combined support covers their medical care, day care costs, and leaves a little extra to cover rent, food, etc.)

As for the kitchen (do it in the bathroom too), put a lock on the fridge and the cupboards (not to deprive them of food but to protect them from getting into danger and hurting themselves). Also, put a baby gate in the doorway of the room you wish to temporarily confine them in, and make it a spanking offense for them to open the baby gate.

Also, you need to institute a strict sleep/nap program. At that age, children need a good 12 plus hours of sleep per day. They should be put to bed at 9 pm at night and not permitted to get out of bed before 7 am (if awake, they can quietly look at picture books in their cribs/bed). And they should have an hour nap every morning from 11 am until noon, and a two hour nap in the afternoon (from 3-5 pm). Don't forget to put motion-detecting alarm on the children's bedroom door and window so you can be warned if they leave their room.

This regular nap program should give you enough time to take care of your personal needs (bathing, telephone time, chores, etc.). And at the same time, you need to teach them to start to behave and "play quietly" when you need to leave them for a few minutes.

Good luck!

Can I lose 50 kg (106 pounds) in 1 year?

Miss McKay

I'm a 14 year old girl, and I weigh 98 kilos (216 pounds). This is the highest my weight has ever been and I sick and tired of being the fat girl in the corner of class that people smile at, but don't talk to. Honestly, I'm a really great person who's got a great personality and sense of humor. But, because I'm fat people automatically reject me as a friend before they even talk to me. I hate the way our society is today, but honestly I'm starting to believe that phrase "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em".... So, I've decided to get a weight loss plan and join the skinny girls, their bikinis, their short shorts, and constant attention from guys. It sounds great, but it's gonna be hard work.
I have a HORRIBLE history with losing weight, diet, and excercise, so I've really given myself a realistic time period to lose 50 kg: I hope and pray by August 2012 I will have lost 50 kg!
Another thing I have to worry about is stretch marks. I have stretch marks on my arms, my back, my legs, and especially my stomach. I can't remember the last time I wore a tank top, or swimsuit without a cover. Also, because of my weight I have excess oil on my face which equals excess acne. Sometimes, especially in P.E., I'm embarrassed to wear shorts because my calves are so huge. My weight has affected my whole life ever since the third grade, from being called fat and crying in the bathroom at school to refusing to eat in public and at school, so people won't think I'm any fatter than I already am. It has affected my self-confidence and my self-esteem ever since elementary schools. When I was younger, I would envy all the pretty girls in my school and say things to them like " I'll never be as pretty/smart/rich as you", or how I constantly rejected the idea of "making friends" because I automatically assumed people would hate me or diss me right in my face if I talked to them. I never wanted to go to summer camp unless one of my friends came with me, because I truly believed no one would like me and I would spend those two weeks by myself. Truthfully, one of my biggest fears is eating alone at lunch. And that's exactly what I did on my first day of eighth grade. I was at a new school and because I was too scared to talk to people, make friends, or sit at a table with other people I ate alone. I sat at the emptiest table and after I finished I just sat there for like 15 minutes just looking around. People were staring and laughing from the table across-- It was one of the most embarrassing days of my life.
My mom doesn't help either. She's overweight/obese too, yet she's always buying fast food, pizza, chinese, wings, and because I eat it she calls me a "greedy pig". My response is "If that's the only thing we have in our fridge, what else am I supposed to eat?". Her response "Starve and lose a couple pounds!" NO JOKE.
My neighborhood is not the best neighborhood for going outside and taking a 30-minute jog. So how can I get the cardio in my daily excercise routines?
I've proposed multiple diet plans and ask to help go grocery shopping, but she will not listen to me when I say not to buy those three bags of chips and two 12-packs of Sunkist soda. Then she buys the most irresistible things and expects me not to eat them because I told her not to buy them, so when I do she once again calls me a "greedy pig". As a child, I don't have a car to drive to the gym and get a membership or go grocery shopping for myself. If my mother can't help me, who will?
Every time I see a model or an asian girl I get sooooo envious and just wish I could take a knife and cut off the fat from my legs and arms.
I'm going into high school this year and by sophomore year I wanna look like all the rest of the girls. Have the chance to get a boyfriend and make lots of new friends.

So, I was thinking of combining a liquid with many toning excercises. For 10 days every month, I would do a full liquid diet: meaning any liquids from ice creams to juices to teas to smoothies, for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. During those 10 days I would only do yoga for 20 minutes everyday because during liquid diets your not supposed to do strenuous excercise. During the other 21/20/19 days of the months I would eat healthy meals and do 30 minutes of cardio everyday. And also I'll have tea every other day to further detoxify my system.

Does this sound like a good/effective plan to do for 12 months?
What are some foods I should not eat at all during these twelve weeks to lose the most weight?
What are some great toning excercises for flabby arms and chunky thighs?
Any great motivation tricks or tips?
Is 50 kg in one year reasonable?
Any other great advice is greatly appreciated!!

Answer
No offense but your plan sounds horrible. Diets don't work. Thats how people fail at losing weights.
You need to learn about nutrition. Learn why people in the US are overweight. Its not fat its carbs and sugar. Yes you need to lay off the fast food but you dont need a stupid liquid diet. All that will do is make you miserable and then you will binge eat.

If you do what I tell you I guarantee you will start to lose weight. Try this for 6 weeks and if you don't see positive results then you can try your way but I am telling you its bad.

You need to start eating healthy and its not really that expensive to do it. Sandwiches on 100% WHOLE WHEAT bread are your friends. Tuna (in sunflower oil like starkist tuna u can get at walmart) and natural peanut butter are really great. They have the healthy fats you need. (your body needs healthy fats to lose weight). Turkey/ham/roast beef and cheese with a bit of mustard. Each you can keep between 200-300 calories

Eggs for breakfast are good. Another good source of protein. Add some fruit with it and your good to go.

There are lots of healthy foods you can eat just be smart about it. Meats/veggies/fruits. Stay away from carbs when you can especially bad stuff. Most of the junk food in the US is sugar and carbs and that activates insulin in your body and causes you to store fat.


This is how you calculate how many calories you need a day to maintain your weight. Then subtract 10-20% for a calorie deficit and then add exercise to lose more.
WOMEN: BMR = [9.99 x weight (kg)] + [6.25 x height (cm)] - [4.92 x age (years)] -161


You then multiply these by an 'activity variable' to give TEE. This Activity Factor[/u] is the cost of living and it is BASED ON MORE THAN JUST YOUR TRAINING. It also includes work/lifestyle, sport & a TEF of ~15% (an average mixed diet). Average activity variables are:
1.2 =Sedentary(Little or no exercise + desk job)
1.3-1.4 = Lightly Active (Little daily activity & light exercise 1-3 days a week)
1.5-1.6 = Moderately Active(Moderately active daily life & Moderate exercise 3-5 days a week)
1.7-1.8 = Very Active (Physically demanding lifestyle & Hard exercise or sports 6-7 days a week)
1.9-2.0 = Extremely Active(Hard daily exercise or sports and physical job)

WORKOUT
You need to do resistance training (aka weight lifting) If you ever watch the biggest loser you always see trainers making them do weights even if they are women. If you think models dont lift weights you are wrong. It helps build muscle which burns more calories. It keeps your body from using muscle as fuel instead of fat. Its all around great. 1 full body routine 3 times a week. It should take about an hour

Cardio. Do cardio everyday. On weightlifting days do it AFTER your workout. Right after. Why? Because when working out your body will use up the sugar in your body for energy first. This is a ready source of energy. When thats gone it will work on fat. If you lift weights first you can get the most out of your weight routine because you are fresh, but then you burn your sugars. That way you are burning fat as soon as your start your cardio.

If you have access to a treadmill that has an incline setting that works awesome. I do that in the morning on my cardio days and then every evening I go for an hour walk before it gets dark.

You can lose 2 pounds a week at a healthy rate. At your weight you could probably lose a little bit more early on and be ok. at 2 pounds a week and 52 weeks a year thats 104 pounds. You can do it.

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How is this section of my Story? In particular could my introductions use work?

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Firepaw

As the airship zoomed through the sky going faster than any airship known to society it's engines started to falter and the crew on board started to get frantic. "Turn on the emergency breaks" shouted some creature over the loud noise of dying engines. As the emergency breaks came on the creatures on the ship relaxed a little and the pilot put the auto-land on high in order to ignore the main engine. As he switched to the second engine the ship sputtered back to life and the crew landed safely in the forest below.

After the ship landed they got out one by one the first to step off was a short stock of a man, with a beard covering almost his entire face and long shaggy hair. The next to get out was a tall slender species with long brown hair and not a touch of facial hair. The green eyes and pointed ears were noticeably the most exotic features on him. As he stepped out he joined the dwarf. The third to come out was the pilot, a species with long slender legs and a greenish brown tint to his skin. The pilot's eyes were beady and stuck out of the top of his head right between his antennas. As he joined his friends by the large tree another being stepped out ducking her head as she came into view. This one had beady eyes as well as a long golden beak. The legs were large and muscular with talons that were covered by armored boots. The last to get out held a cuffed prisoner in front of her wolf like form. As she threw the prisoner forward he stumbled and was caught by the insect. After Shaytara got out she set the ship to stealth mode to keep it hidden in case they needed it later.

As the group gathered around they began to search for a good place to set up a camp. It would only be a one night camp, still, Shaytara decided they would need a tent with a prison room. She took out a steel ball, placed it on the ground and stepped on a button on the top of the ball. In an instant the steel ball transformed into a tent. It stood about four feet over their heads. The prison cell stood in the front of them across from the entrance hall. There were three rooms to their right and two to their left. The table in the center was for dining or meeting at and the small fridge in the wall only contained food that was provided. There was also a microwave oven built into the wall and a stove built into the floor. As Shaytara put the food in the fridge; the bug threw the prisoner in his cell and closed it with a lever on the floor a good three feet away from the prison cell. The group sat at the table in order to have a meeting about their current position. They were after all politicians to some extent.

Just when Shaytara was about to speak the prisoner stirred from his coma as though he was supposed to. The prisoner looked just like Shaytara only larger and more masculine. As he spoke above Shaytara everyone looked at him in disgust. "You're all traitors to the United Galaxies; you will die by my hands when I get out of here." "If you kill one of us in our sleep the rest of us will hear you." "Oh, my dear daughter you're so wrong in assuming you'll be asleep when I kill you." "You're nothing less than a blood spitting coward" said Kadyen the elf. "You're one to speak of cowardice Kadyen. You could be high Prince if you wanted to; instead you let your dull *** brother rule the elves only for the fact that he has magic." "You fool how dare you speak about a member of the high council in such a way." "I should be a representative of the high council; thanks to my very own daughter and her blood spitting mate I'm just a prisoner on a completely unknown world."

Answer
It is good, well planned. Needs a bit of brush up in the opening intro... Other wise colour me intrigued

Wrote a long letter to my local MP and the reply I got was "Constituent Ms Paige?" what that mean?

Sophie

The letter I wrote;

Dear Jim Fitzpatrick,
I am a young person (eighteen) who's recently moved into my own accommodation for the first time after coming out a resettlement program/a hostel. In august I applied for a community care grant to set up my first ever home, but got declined. I'm not in contact with any family and therefore have to support myself. I since then have appealed a number of times to be declined again. One of there requirements is to have come out of a resettlement program of what I have.

I quote this section that is within a letter sent to me:

"We can pay community care grants to help people in certain circumstances. For example:

- to return to, or stay in, the community rather than having to be in 'care'. By 'care' we mean places like hospital, nursing homes and old people's home.
- to return to the community from places like detention centres.
- to cope with exceptional pressure on themselves and their families.
- to set up home in the community as part of a planned resettlement programme following a period when a person has no permanent home.
- to visit someone who is ill or for another urgent reason. "

So I don't understand why I'm getting declined. I'm currently actively seeking work and finding it difficult as I haven't got the basic essentials to look after myself.

Today ( 15th November 2012), I phoned up to apply for a crisis loan and the person who I spoke to I also asked for advice on the community care grant being declined. I then found out that what I applied for apparently wasn't essential. I'll list some ex samples bellow.

I applied for a cooker so I can cook - I got told that its not essential and I could use a camping gas cooking gadget on top of my kitchen counters.

I applied for a fridge freezer - I got told that its also not essential and I can use a ice bag that will get my food to last for 2-3 days.
I applied for a washing machine as I don't know of any local laundry places - I got told that instead I can wash by hand.
I applied for some blinds as my flat is facing somebody else's accommodation - I got told as I'm on the 2nd floor it's not essential.
I applied for a bed base and mattress - I got told a base is not required but they would supply money for a cheap mattress.
Flooring such as carpet - I got told its not essential and I can get within my own time.
I applied for sofas, table and chairs - I got told this is not essential and I can sit on the floor.
I also applied for small objects such as a cutlery set and plate set but didn't get a comment on that.
I find it upsetting knowing that I really haven't got anybody out there to turn to for help. I wouldn't be requesting this financial aid of them if it was not required. Around the time I applied, a friend of mine who was also coming out a resettlement program applied for a community care grant with the same circumstances but also applied for similar items. She was given £1115 by the DWP who supply the community care grant. But yet I was declined. It seems to come across as random selection to who gets the financial support weather or not if there the same circumstances.

Another friend who is a young parents too two young children under the age of 5 is currently living in a privately rented temporary flat of what is currently fully furnished will be moving to a council temporary house that is unfurnished. She applied for a community care grant that would enable to set up a safe furnished home for herself and two young children. But has been declined of what is disgraceful as it seems the DWP would rather her have a young baby and a toddler sleeping on the floor? Like myself she's also has minimal contact with family and has to support herself and two children. I don't see why she has be declined as she has a legit reason.

I also found out from my key-worker from the hostel that this is a regularly thing people getting declined who have come out of a resettlement program. But after appealing four to five time then get £500 off the DWP what's half that was requested to set up a home. My hostel itself only takes on women from the age of 16-23, so when we move into our own accommodation we're young individuals who have come out of shared supported accommodation with the basic appliances we need. Too our own accommodation with nothing but a roof over our heads.

Personally, I think that resettlement programs, hostels and the DWP should all be joined. So when a person is ready to move into there own accommodation without the hassle of waiting months to see if you will be entitled to the financial support. They should be in contact with each-other before the person gets there accommodation so they money could possibly be set aside so soon as they move into there first flat. They have the money to set it up financially.

Yours faithfully

Answer
means your last name is Paige

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Can you please help me decode my dream?.. please dont be put off by the amount of writing :)?

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Q. i was camping the grass is fairly green and dewy and im camping i think with my best friend and some of my other friends but they weren't really in the dream much i think there was a few groups at the camping grounds and i was walking along the dusty dirt road kinda thing like what you see at camping grounds and i saw one of my friends ive been friends with him for my entire life we aren't all that close but we can be hes a typical guy not much talking more just chillin or talking but not just random jibber jabber to fill in the space.. we use to flirt a bit well he used to flirt with me and use to like lie with his head in my lap while we were chilling on my other friends bed with the rest of the group.. he is a bit of a ladies man.. we've also previously hinted that were attracted to each other like in conversations talking about our sex lives and then we were flirting a bit talking about pickup lines and stuff and hes a pretty attractive guy but hes got a girlfriend now so that's why i thought this dream was a bit odd because in my dream it was kinda like she wasn't there they weren't going out or she didn't exist which is kinda weird 'cause i don't really like him or anything its more just a bit of fun being teenagers flirting and stuff and anyway so in my dream i saw him walking along the road and so i walked up next to him and was like hey and we were just walking and chatting and the subject somehow came to my virginity and he was like well i could fix that for you ;) and i was like oh you would be willing to would you?? and then he was like maybe haha and we made a deal he had to go somewhere so i would set up and hed meet me back at the camping ground later and so we made a deal and for some odd reason there was a queen bed in the middle of the field haha but it was still in view of like campers and stuff but for some reason it was like no-one payed attention to the bed like they acknowledged it but didn't it didn't seem to puzzle them at all or anything which is kinda weird but it was kind of near the block where there's toilets and showers and sinks and stuff like that i think chairs tables and mable some fridges too but it was still pretty far away from that and the rest of the campers.. and anyway so i went and made the bed and the only thing there to use was an aqua or pink sheet that was on the bottom and a dark purple sheet that i put on top the sheets were kind of silky and anyway then there was a white doona with black at the end and a massive flower that's where the black and the white join and i think the flower was white where everything else was black and black where everything else is white if you know what i mean.. and anyway i was like he might be a little while so ill just slide into bed and wait and i chucked the doona on the floor i think and then i was just lying naked under the sheet with it like partially draped over me and and i was just lying there drawing figure 8s and stuff with my finger on the sheets and just watching the grass and the stars and the rest of my surroundings.. and then i woke up although i do remember that whilst on the bed waiting in my dream i was daydreaming about when he gets there of him just climbing onto the bed and like hugging me from behind while i was still lying drawing and then i arch my back and move into him a bit and then turn around and lean up a bit and kiss him and then he lowers me down while were kissing.. and yeah that was my dream can you please try to decode this a little im just curious as to what it means.. oh im nearly 18 if that helps at all.. thanks heaps in advance :)
haha ok then thanks :) haha yeah i barely remember my dreams but when i do i remember quite a bit about them. i remember heaps about this one because i thought it was a bit weird so decided to write it down when i woke up :)

Answer
I'm surprised you remember all of that...please don't be put off by my amount of writing.

ok as a dream interpreter i will start off telling you that ALL dreams mean nothing! Dreams just express you or your emotions, they express what you feel and what you do in real life. thats why they feel so real. Dreams cannot create people, places and things thats another reason why they feel so real! dreams recall past memory, -for example if you see a person you don't recognize in dreams, you probably saw him before on TV or walking in the street (you probably didn't pay attention to them). Dreams express your emotions and thoughts in a negative wa

Nothing. The dream was about nothing. dreams mean nothing they just express your emotions and feelings in a symbolic way.

Dreams are simple synapses in your brain firing off all sorts of things. Your brain gathers all this random information, sights, sounds and so forth. And as you are sleeping, these sights and essentially memories are jumbled up into one big mess, just random nonsense, and your brain works and works for an hour or so trying to create a nice little story with all of these sights and sounds because it wants to make sense of it. It wants to make sense out of nonsense! So, then you end up with this dream. This happens several times in one night but when you wake up, you forget all of them, and when you do remember one of them, when you do remember at least one dream, we try to make sense of it. We tell ourselves, what is this? What could it mean. When in reality, it means nothing, it is just complete nonsense. So stop trying to make sense of it, it is nothing!

Source(s):
dream interpreter, took courses in dream interpretation and psychology

can you please tell me what my dream means?

Q. i was camping the grass is fairly green and dewy and im camping i think with my best friend and some of my other friends but they weren't really in the dream much i think there was a few groups at the camping grounds and i was walking along the dusty dirt road kinda thing like what you see at camping grounds and i saw one of my friends ive been friends with him for my entire life we aren't all that close but we can be hes a typical guy not much talking more just chillin or talking but not just random jibber jabber to fill in the space.. we use to flirt a bit well he used to flirt with me and use to like lie with his head in my lap while we were chilling on my other friends bed with the rest of the group.. he is a bit of a ladies man.. we've also previously hinted that were attracted to each other like in conversations talking about our sex lives and then we were flirting a bit talking about pickup lines and stuff and hes a pretty attractive guy but hes got a girlfriend now so that's why i thought this dream was a bit odd because in my dream it was kinda like she wasn't there they weren't going out or she didn't exist which is kinda weird 'cause i don't really like him or anything its more just a bit of fun being teenagers flirting and stuff and anyway so in my dream i saw him walking along the road and so i walked up next to him and was like hey and we were just walking and chatting and the subject somehow came to my virginity and he was like well i could fix that for you ;) and i was like oh you would be willing to would you?? and then he was like maybe haha and we made a deal he had to go somewhere so i would set up and hed meet me back at the camping ground later and so we made a deal and for some odd reason there was a queen bed in the middle of the field haha but it was still in view of like campers and stuff but for some reason it was like no-one payed attention to the bed like they acknowledged it but didn't it didn't seem to puzzle them at all or anything which is kinda weird but it was kind of near the block where there's toilets and showers and sinks and stuff like that i think chairs tables and mable some fridges too but it was still pretty far away from that and the rest of the campers.. and anyway so i went and made the bed and the only thing there to use was an aqua or pink sheet that was on the bottom and a dark purple sheet that i put on top the sheets were kind of silky and anyway then there was a white doona with black at the end and a massive flower that's where the black and the white join and i think the flower was white where everything else was black and black where everything else is white if you know what i mean.. and anyway i was like he might be a little while so ill just slide into bed and wait and i chucked the doona on the floor i think and then i was just lying naked under the sheet with it like partially draped over me and and i was just lying there drawing figure 8s and stuff with my finger on the sheets and just watching the grass and the stars and the rest of my surroundings.. and then i woke up although i do remember that whilst on the bed waiting in my dream i was daydreaming about when he gets there of him just climbing onto the bed and like hugging me from behind while i was still lying drawing and then i arch my back and move into him a bit and then turn around and lean up a bit and kiss him and then he lowers me down while were kissing.. and yeah that was my dream can you please try to decode this a little im just curious as to what it means.. oh im nearly 18 if that helps at all
can i please have a more serious answer than the first one bellow..

Answer
ur horny

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